What's up with these confusing butters??

so deceiving

A couple weeks ago, I went to Trader Joe's.
I picked up a jar of something deliciously called Honey Apple Butter.
"Yes!" I thought, "Apple flavored butter? Get in my mouth!"
I went home, grabbed a butter knife, opened up the jar and ravenously buttered a piece of bread with the apple butter.
I was so excited.
The butter had a jam consistency.
I should have known.
I shoved the "buttered" bread in my mouth.
To my surprise, it was apple sauce.
No buttery-ness about it.
What the heck..
Boring.
It's now sitting in my fridge, untouched.

this guy's in on it, too

I had a field day at Whole Foods last night.
I picked up a jar of something called Coconut Butter.
I went home, grabbed a spoon, opened up the jar and ravenously scooped up a spoonful of creamy white coconut butter.
I was so excited.
I shoved the spoon in my mouth.
To my surprise, it was solid butter.
That tasted like coconut.
I thought it'd be more like peanut butter, y'know?
But it was actual butter.
A globful of cold coconut butter in my mouth.
Not a pleasurable experience.
What the heck.


Life is confusing.