eating tj's

Oh, Crunchy curls. You deviously divine concoction of lentils and potatoes. You will be the death of me. Before meeting you, never had I ever finished a large sized bag of chips in one sitting. I cannot stay away from you. Especially when you coat yourself in goat cheese. I want my lips all over you. Crunch.

doopdoopeedoop

it ees summer.

summertime by ella fitzgerald reminds me of a hot, sticky day, sitting on the porch sipping lemonade while looking out into the smoldering dirt horizon.

mmmmm.

track

ran around with foxy at the park. :)

yft

yft?

your favorite things?
yes! fight! ting!
yummy food thoughts!
yams for tonight!
yamaha flute trio!

dadada

yulree fun time!

little kid

i cried. i laughed.

it made me happy.

yes

"Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions." - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

soul windows

walked by a big-windowed cafe. briefly looked in only to lock eyes with a little boy wearing a batman&robin-esque mask and the biggest grin you can imagine on the most adorable kid ever. ever. he was sitting with his parents, eating lunch and enjoying life.

double.fun.time

inching closer! ny in 2 more weeks!

sidenote: having VERY vivid dreams. enjoying it.
i was dreaming this morning that i was in a submarine and an alarm went off. i yelled out loud to all my crewmembers, "that's such an ugly alarm sound, who freakin' installed it on the submarine??" and i woke up to my clock alarm...which really does sound ugly. i chuckled.

food: lost a bit of an appetite due to a pound of stress incessantly poking at the top left of my head, aka migraine. comes and goes. trying to get rid of this loser with exercise and being productive. appetite better be back when i go to ny!!!

nostalgia

bringing it all back...


"Hand In My Pocket" - Alanis Morissette

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby
What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving a high five
I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working, yeah
I care but I'm restless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be quite alright
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is flicking a cigarette
And what it all comes down to
Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving the peace sign
I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly baby
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chickenshit
I'm sick but I'm pretty baby

And what it all boils down to
Is that no one's really got it figured out just yet
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is playing the piano
And what it all comes down to my friends
Is that everything's just fine fine fine
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is hailing a taxi cab

[Harmonica solo]

high

sometimes, random times, i would be walking somewhere and i'd feel like i'm somewhere else...
in korea
in china
in thailand
in turkey
in new york
somewhere i've been and loved
it'd be evoked by a specific smell in the air, or a sound, or the weather...
and i'd get such a high off of that

it's the little things that really get me


---

Sidenote: i saw a woman dancing while driving in her car this morning. i fell in love with her a little bit.

Sidenote2: i am getting old. i've been experiencing my first migraine. aiyo.

struggle

but wear and tear on my mind, i know it's going to make me stronger, but feel weak for now
riding it out, weather the tumultuous life, with benevolent friends by my side
i am strong, yet feel so weak

it's not that i can't find a job, it's the idea of not knowing WHAT exactly WANT to do RIGHT NOW. *sigh*


---
Food:
1) have been meeting some really rad people through yelpity yelp. another win for food.

2) this past year, i've been seeing a gradual evolution in the mother-daughter relationship...
me taking care of mom: check
me buying her makeup: check
me giving her clothes i don't wear and think would look good on her: check
me feeding mom: check
me giving food ingredients to mom: check! i made a whole load of pesto b/c i ended up buying a basket of basil (i had to! they didn't have it in smaller batches!); put some in a panini i made for my mom; she loved it; i gave her the whole load

sweet

ladida

I'm in a weird transition stage right now, and am figuring out how I should live now that I'm jobless.

I've resorted to eating whatever I have in my cabinets and fridge and watching episode after episode of 30Rock. That's only after many hours of having fits of panic and stress while trying to do everything all at once - find a job, figure out living situation, figure out what to do with student loans, get unemployment benefits, finish my work at this job, tell all my friends, talk to my parents, figure out if i should sell anything...and the most crucial thing I would like to do? Narrow down what I want to do in life, and then categorize them into 'realistic' and 'kinda unrealistic' bins.

I continue to have this struggle between "life is too short, I should do what I want to do NOW" to "I need to secure my future, must. find. secure. job. (said in a robotic way while doing the robot dance, of course)" UGH.

In any case, I need to keep myself healthy to do anything. EXERCISE.

support

Friends are all so supportive.
Family is supportive. They are survivors and know how to get through this.
The Lord is my silent but biggest supporter.

Keeping my head up high. :)
I am a survivor! rawr.

fail to win

I got laid off today.
This is a huge milestone. I got laid off for the first time in my life.
It's hard to express my feelings...
I guess all I can say is, "omfgasdfahfoihw whooohooooooo"

The thing is, I was planning to quit by the end of February. Because of many many many many many reasons. Since two weeks ago, I've been very uneasy...b/c my personal due date for my 2-weeks notice was coming up...it takes big balls to quit! So I put it off, but the more I put it off, the more unhappy I was. Then today, I get called in to the office and they let me go.

I've never had this happen to me before...when my boss' words "I'm sorry but we have to let you go," came out of his mouth, it was in slow motion, as if I was in a dream. It took me about a minute to realize that I was actually not dreaming.

It's so uncanny. Perfect timing. The day I was going to quit is the day I get fired. I feel very good. I feel like I'm in the best position there is.

Time to celebrate with my favorite coworkers who also got laid off today. Huge celebration. Liberation.

tapping out

i went to an all-you-can-eat korean bbq place this past weekend. for freeeee.
i had a fairly good time, met 1-2 cool people and ate a lot. for freeeee.
one particular memory from this night is haunting me. it refuses to leave me alone. i don't feel very good about it.
i out-ate two guys. not just out-ate them, but out-ate them by several plates of meat. and not just out-ate them by several plates of meat...(this is where it gets sad for me)...when they tapped out from being so full, that moment when they were already soooo full from eating one more bite, i was still eating because i was STILL HUNGRY. i wasn't even partially full. no, not even 1/3 full.

yulree's gastromonster needs to calm the heck down.

life

it wasn't my proudest moment.
remember how i said i wanted to improve my writing skills
and that i'd try reading great literature to achieve this?
the first book i picked up was 'confessions of a shopaholic'
it's quite funny, actually
well, the book was okay
but i was referring to how i ended up buying the book
i bought it on a whim
i was never attracted to girly books like this
where the titles include words like "shopping" or "bitch" or "he's just not that into you"
so it was a spontaneous consumption
while i was at the drugstore
waiting for my film to be developed
i also bought makeup i didn't need
dental floss that i did need
and intellectual reading material like the economist
to lessen my guilt for succumbing to girly books
my actions reflecting the very vice of the protagonist

the book left me wanting to spend more
because the protagonist spent tons
or tonnes, if you're british
and she still had a happy ending that brought joy and dolladollabillsyo
and she even scored a tall, hot millionaire
who was more nuts about her than his monies
and since when did books lie to you?
i can spend spend spend and have my happy ending, too! psh.

then i was pretty much bitch-slapped back to reality
when my dog had teeth and gum complications
it cost me some worry, tears and a grand
yeah, a friggin' grand
i don't even say the word grand
because in what case did i ever have to?

i brought lunch to work today
a quiche
a frozen $3 quiche for that matter
itadakimasu


---
Food: I invited several of my friends over for a Chinese New Year mini-celebration. It's my year - the year of the Ox. And so I made ox-tail soup and spicy braised short ribs as my main dishes. Everyone ate till they were full. *pats back*

limits

i am an extroverted introvert.

---
Food: Super duper easy - I bought some thinly sliced rib-eye from Japanese grocery store, marinated it in a tangy sesame dressing that I bought a while ago, added some onions and garlic, wrapped it in foil and popped it in the oven.

Took me 5 minutes to prepare. I only had to marinate the meat for a minute because of the thin cut. I also found it resourceful. I have all these salad dressings that I never use b/c a smelly cheese, olive oil and balsamic vinegar work just fine. Actually, it works wonders...mmmmm. I don't even know why I bought them. I guess it was on sale or it sounded like a good idea at the time. Now I can use them to marinate shizz. veggies. catfish. shrimp. chicken. chocolate. Ew, marinated chocolate. Gross.

gluttonous sloth

Yesterday...
I forgot to pay my bills
didn't eat any vegetables or fruit
ended up not walking my dog
forgot to bring workout cloths to the gym

So...
I ended up reading my first fictional book in like 4 years (that ironically is about a girl who has trouble paying her credit card bills)
ate a whole bag of salt & vinegar chips
cleaned the dog pee out of the carpet
and fell asleep at 9:30 pm

:)


sidenote: Found out that the genius behind 'Gabriel's Oboe' is Ennio Morricone. Listened to more of his pieces and have fallen in love with him. His compositions are so full of emotions, just what I love. I'm very excited about it because I haven't found a 'soundtrack' composer I liked since Henry Mancini. And of course Morricone wrote the score for Cinema Paridiso!

---
Food: I love that in L.A., you can find so many ethnic grocery stores, each with its own special characteristics. I go to Korean markets for bread, pastries, fresh fish, meats and great quality fruit. I go to Mexican markets for good deals on spices, herbs and fish. I go to Japanese markets for reallllly fresh fish for sushi/sashimi. I go to Chinese markets for loads of vegetables. Last but not least, I go to Trader Joe's for cheese and everything else besides meat/fish/veggies (tends to be more expensive, unless frozen).

borderline rambunctious?

brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag brag

leave it at home.


---
Food: I love aguas frescas de sandia

less of that and more of this

eating --> moving


---
Sidenote: I want to try pickling something.

slow day at the office

reading news, stumbled upon this.

clickittoseeit

i should show my mother this. my mom who incessantly wishes (both in her prayers and to my face) for me to enter an ethnically homogeneous marriage "...so that your children won't get confused and have an identity crisis" (mom).

i think there are bigger things to worry about. i have plenty of friends who are happa (ethnically mixed) and are more mentally sound and healthy than the majority of people in this world.

i wonder what would happen if there were no such thing as ethnicities and everyone had an UN passport. would we have had as many wars, genocides, and conflicts? maybe we'd just focus on something else to fight about.


btw, i LOVE that obama was also a third-culture kid (tck).

---
Food: This happens rarely, maybe once every 6 months - I would actually spend an ENTIRE day looking at everything food related on the web. Whether it's looking at restaurant menus, restaurant deals, food blogs with pictures, food blogs without pictures, yelp, yelp, yelp, loads of recipes, kitchen appliances, more recipes, more cooking blogs, food & wine section of newspapers and magazines...I'm crazy.

Maybe I should go into the food business since I love food and cooking so much.

a recurring issue

I suck at writing.
I read a lot.
I wrote a lot in high school and college.
But I still suck at writing.

Okay, maybe I don't suck. but I am not as marvelous as I want to be. and by marvelous I mean 'the person who wrote this must be a brilliant being, this being is attractively intimidating and intimidatingly attractive and I must get to know this person' kind of marvelous.

I used to blame my parents. because they don't speak English. They don't write English. Maybe I still blame them a little bit. I blame them for a lot of things, but it never devalues all the other great things they've provided me with.
I also blame how much value was placed on speedreading as a student. Read quickly, skip words, get the content, move on.

Anyway. Today, I am deciding that I will own up and take charge of this pending issue. As of this moment, deciding has become a decided.

There are many ways that I can reach the world of exquisite writing. I imagine this world to be full of fancy people, charming people. Stoners who effortlessly come up with the most beautiful phrases, poets and musicians (also probably stoned) who breath life into words, best of the bloggers, rappers, journalists and authors - all reside there, spitting beautiful verbage at each other.

Perhaps I should read books, this time focusing more on the skill and less on the content. Perhaps I should venture outside of the International Relations and Environmental genres and read more poetry, and the literary classics.

Setting sail.



note to self: start with that book with the pretty looking indian woman that i borrowed from ac

blogism. blogish. blogery.

blogess